For those of you who regularly read my blog, this will be a departure from my “thought provoking” posts that I usually publish. Instead, I feel it is my civic duty to remind you all about the dangers of drugs.
So, the Health Department and Friends have launched a campaign (it’s been going on for some years now) about saying “No!” to drugs and “Living Above the Influence.” In these campaigns, they bring to your attention drugs (controlled substances) such as marijuana, alcohol, and other ones that people regularly talk about (cocaine, heroine, and others). I think this is good. Great, actually, and very much needed.
BUT I THINK THERE IS SOMETHING MISSING!
So, before I go into my story, I would just like to give a brief disclaimer:
This is the real me. I joke. I make fun of things (that’s synonymous with joke). I actually like to find the funny in situations. With all of that being said, I DO NOT CONDONE DRUG USE OF ANY KIND! Unless, it’s a Love Drug (peace, y’all…not war)!!!
Now that I’ve gotten that out of the way, I’ll tell y’all about my time with the most powerful, fun, amazing, scary, detrimental drug known to man — THAT CHICK CAFFEINE!
I was “gone off”** of an espresso drink. It wasn’t even made the regular way either…what I had was an Espresso Lite.*** Here’s how it went:
I was sitting in the library, chatting with my Sorority Sister about my daily goals (by the way, none of them were reached). Then we both decided to stop chatting with each other because we had things to do. At this point, it is 12 Noon. So, I go on my merry way to find something to eat and drink (something affordable…which is hard to do when you are broke student who is sick of Ramen Noodles). I hit Thayer Street and for some reason, I had a slow moment and decided that Starbucks would be a good decision (This is the first clue that you have no business doing what you’re about to do — if you have to justify whatEVER it is, then just stop!). I also decided that “breakfast” would be the best thing to get because I hadn’t eaten anything since I’d been up. I also decided to “live on the edge” and order something I never do — a Caramel Macchiato (which is delicious, by the way). So, I place my order, get my food and drink, sit down, and enjoy it.
Right about 2:00, I decided that I had to make a move on campus. I had been at Starbucks now for 2 hours and I had to visit a Dean of the Graduate School before her office hours were over (she’s a real cool lady). So, I send a message to my friend that I was chatting with over AIM to say that I’d be back in 30 minutes. I also forgot to send a message to the other three people who I was chatting with…blame it on the Espresso folks. My eyes were getting jumpy at this point. Anyway, I gathered my things, walked across campus (which ISN’T that big), chatted it up with the Dean, and then went to the Library. Something in my soul told me that it would all be downhill from there:
It was only 2:15 pm (go ahead and laugh…this mess had me feeling like I was floating at this point). Anyway, I’m sitting in the library just….shaking. It was to the point that I began to giggle. Not worry…it didn’t scare me yet. It was just super funny. So, another 40 minutes goes by, and things just get more heightened. I felt enlightened and I was going down memory lane. At one point, I was consciously aware of AT LEAST 14 thoughts running through my head at once. I wish I could have typed them all out at the same time lol…but that’s not the point of this.
At this point, I actually wrote on Twitter:
MissCJayne: I had a drink with espresso & I’m jittery like a mother right now….lol. HELP! I’m bout to run though this library. I can’t sit still!!!!
YOU, yes you, reading this can laugh. It was funny. Then it all went downhill in a matter of minutes. As I’m sitting at my table, trying to look normal, I’m pretty sure that I did since no one reported me to library officials, this chick walks in and looks around for a place to sit. She walks over to my table and asks if she can sit down. I say, “Sure…go ahead” and clear space for her (that’s another reason I knew I was “high”…I had a table covered with my stuff. It fit four people and I was the ONLY person there). Then she sits down and I became paranoid. It didn’t help matters that she left after about 30 minutes leaving her laptop and taking everything else that she brought with her. This resulted in these tweets on Twitter:
MissCJayne: So, the chick sitting at my table left her laptop and took her bookbag. I’m bout to move. I feel like it’s a bomb.
MissCJayne: If something blows up at Brown Univ, the chick had shoulder length brown hair, she was about 5’2”, thin and she had a European accent.
MissCJayne: Okay, so I just realized that when I’m on espresso, I’m super paranoid. SUPER PARANOID!
The actual time between writing those tweets was seven minutes. In that time, I’d packed up my own stuff and alerted the proper officials at the Library Circulation Desk (I’m not a fan of the Stop Snitching Movement…I’m telling everything…and you can quote me!). Then I went across the street to see what would happen. Two cops showed up and I guess things were fine.
Okay, I actually KNOW that things were fine. I went back in and students were once again sitting at their respective tables/on couches and settling back in. The poor girl at my table looked so shaken…but I couldn’t help but tell. I was extra paranoid because of that drink.
So, I stayed at the library for another hour and then I’m not really sure what happened after that. I remembered feeling calm around 6:45 pm or 7:00 pm. Then I remembered going home around 10:00 pm. Then I remembered going to sleep around 11:45 pm. Then I remembered waking up around 5:00 am this MORNING because I just woke up. I had a horrible migraine and I actually felt like I was hung over. Class today was a struggle, I almost fell asleep in my first one and I really couldn’t participate in class two because I didn’t read anything during my “high moments” from the day before.
I’m still feeling a little “off” but I’ll bounce back in no time. I just wanted to bring attention to a drug that people often overlook…because well, it can be very serious. I mean, I almost had an international student sent home and all she went to do was use the bathroom (I STILL want to know why she took her bookbag and her purse and just left her laptop; she could have left that bookbag too???).
So, kids. The point of this, besides hopefully giving you a laugh, is that you all become aware of the danger that is caffeine. I’ve heard about people who are really addicted and I still tried it. As you can see, it wasn’t too great. So, I hope you all stick to herbal tea! Celestial Seasonings is a really good one…and they come with a coupon in EVERY box!
**gone off – to be under the influence of some substance.
***Espresso Lite – a drink in which the normal amount of espresso is reduced.
This is an original publication by Miss C. Jayne. As soon as I figure out how to do that copyright symbol, I will. Don’t steal my thoughts without giving credit. At my university, you get kicked out and are horribly shamed. I’m not so nice! lol 🙂